Post 100

Well this is my 100th post and I thought of doing something fun for it, you know like the kids do for the 100th day of school.  Silly things that add up to 100 or pictures or just something fun but I decided to make this post about reflections.

You see these past few years have brought many changes into my life.  Some of them, well most of them have been tough on me.  I have been through job changes, been through illness and loss, trials and pain, sadness and happiness, and through it all life continues.....

I have spent more days and nights in hospital chairs, waiting rooms, ER rooms, ICU rooms, hospice, labor and delivery, anti pardom, post pardom, and the NICU than most people will in a lifetime.  I have had my dad struggle with congestive heart failure and pass away, my nephew in a severe car accident, 2 sisters who had a couple surgeries, a mom who had a double knee replacement, a brother who survived cancer TWICE, a sister in law that survived breast cancer TWICE, a sister in law that has had 3 minor surgeries, a sister in law in the hospital now,  a daughter with a high risk pregnancy, and a grandson who is going through a lot right now. (all this in the past 5 or 6 years) I have lost jobs and friends, had pay cuts and financial difficulties, made new friends and got new jobs, lost weight and gained a bit back :(  had short hair and grew it out, loved and have been loved, and still life goes on....

I have learned many things.  I have taught myself  new things.  I figured out how to blog. I have learned to be satisfied with what I have and not what I don't.  I have learned to be patient. I have learned to look at the big picture.  Learned to be self sufficient.  Become more confident.  Tried to be less judgemental. Learned new skills. Learned new hobbies. Spend more time with my children. Tried to be healthier. Tried to love exercise (failed that one).  I have learned to step outside of my comfort zone.  Learned to let things go.  Learned that I can be better. Learned that I am not so bad....

As I reflect on the many things that I have been through in these past few years I can't help but wonder what has kept me all together, why I have not completely lost it. The only thing that has kept me going is the love I have for the people in my life that give me a reason to get up in the morning.  Life can be tough and things may not work out the way we want them to.  I can honestly say I have not always been happy with what my life has been like. I have tried to be thankful for what I have and not what I don't.  I try to  look for the good in people, I forgive, I give second chances,  I try not to offend, I try to give 100 percent.  I am no where close to perfection and I have hurt people in my life.  Even those that I care most about but I move on, ask forgiveness, and try to learn from my mistakes.  Life is not always fair, things don't always turn out the way we plan, but life is good.  I came to this world to learn and grow.  To develop talents and go through trials.  I am doing what I was sent here to do and trying to do a good job at it.  So as the roller coaster in my life goes up and down the hills I will keep on trying, keep on loving, keep on learning, keep plugging along, and most of all keep my head up and try to do my best.

For the trials I've learned from I have to say THANK YOU. For all of you who have been there for me through it all, THANK YOU. For the prayers and support, THANK YOU. For forgiving me if I have hurt you, THANK YOU. But most of all for the love I have felt through it all, THANK YOU.  All of you make me what I am today, THANK YOU.